Learning more about myself...

I think my HyVee dietitian, Jennifer, is more of a psychologist/counselor than anything.  We don't just talk about what to eat/what not to eat, but we also discuss attitudes/beliefs/feelings toward food.  One of the things I learned this week is that I have to work on my beliefs toward fast food/restaurant food. 

It started with a simple comment about me worrying about a meal that Mike and I had at Arby's.  It wasn't the worst food I could have chosen, but it certainly wasn't the most healthy.  We started talking about how I felt about eating out and through a series of thought-provoking questions, I discovered I tend to elevate restaurant eating in my mind. 

Growing up as one of 4 children, we didn't spend a lot of time at restaurants.  Plus that just wasn't how it was done back then.  To get to go to McDonald's was something very special.  As a result, I still tend to think of these visits as very special and I want to get the most food out of the visit as possible.  Plus I like a good "value." 

She reassured me that my way of thinking is not bad, it just is how I think.  I need to work on re-directing those thoughts and changing my views so that restaurants are just other places to get food and it doesn't have to be a gorge-fest.  I have an assignment to complete for that in order to help her help me start to make that shift. 

I'm very pleased with the money I've invested in these visits.  It is NOT what I expected at all.  If you live near Macomb, IL, and you want/need help with eating, I would strongly recommend that you invest in yourself and visit Jennifer.  The program I am doing is $60 for 10 visits.  The first visit is free, so you actually get 11 visits.  At first, I wondered what on earth we were going to talk about for so many visits and now I wonder if it will be enough!  She is very nice and easy to talk to, she does not make you feel judged for what you eat/how much you eat/what you don't eat.  You are who you are and your life experiences have shaped you into that person.  It is what it is, and she completely embraces that.  Yet she will help you work on changing your thought processes so that you can live a better, HEALTHIER life. 

Overall she is quite pleased with what I've been eating.  I was quite proud of myself this past Tuesday for taking my own lunch to a lunch-time meeting where pizza was provided for us.  I did not even want to go to the meeting but it was a very important one, so I put on my Big Girl Pants and went with the food I had prepared at home.  There were about a dozen men there and one other woman.  No one blinked an eye, said a word, or even tried to tempt me with pizza.  Yes, I still felt pretty self-conscious, but I know I was making the best decision for ME and what the other people thought didn't matter.  And I lived to tell the tale. 

Monday night's Biggest Loser meeting was a counselor from the campus counseling center who talked to us about emotional eating.  I am starting to become aware of when I am feeling stressed and want to eat everything.  I have a few coping mechanisms in place, which involve texting or calling a few friends who I can count on to talk me down.  The girl who is our nutrition coach for the contest has even agreed to be one of those people for me.  I can also remove myself from the situation, such as when standing in the Walmart checkout line, faced that wall of convenient candy bars that are screaming my name.  If there's no rush, I can exit the checkout and walk around the store, particularly in the ladies clothing area, and look at the stuff that I'd like to be able to wear. 

It was somewhat of an interesting talk.  Most of the other 4 girls really didn't have much to contribute, so it almost felt like I was having a very public counseling session with the woman about my disordered eating habits.  She tried her best to engage the other girls, but for whatever reason, they were very reluctant to open up.  Of course, I'm much older than they are with more life experience, and I don't give a fig what they think of me.  They are within their peer group, so they may have been more self-conscious.  Regardless, I am trying to get as much as I possibly can out of this experience.  If I have to share embarrassing stories, so be it.  I will very likely never encounter these girls again.  And if I do, so what?  It's nothing I wouldn't and haven't shared here!  LOL

And now...the weekly weigh in!  According to the scales, I lost 2.5 lbs this week.  Yay!  It's about time I see that scale moving in that direction.  Hopefully it will continue. 

Does anyone else have a problem with fast food/restaurant food?  Do you feel like you have to get as much food for your dollar as you can, or am I the only one?