Been a while since I posted. Last time I checked in here, I was at 239.0. Since then, I went back up to 243.50, and tonight was at 242.5. My goal is to hit 239.0 by the end of the month.
I thought I was taking a step in the right direction by amping up the exercise, but that didn't seem to work. I'm a little frustrated right now and am trying to figure it out. I will get this!
Classes start back up next Monday, so who knows how that's going to affect my efforts. I'm taking FIN 301, Personal Finance, and PHYS 101, Intro to Astronomy. Still on track to graduate in December 2012, and I hope to stay that way. Am starting to look at master's degree programs because...apparently I enjoy the punishment. Actually, there are several programs that I wish I could do but I don't have the time. I would love to study accounting, law enforcement, dietetics, exercise science, writing, etc. Might just take some classes in those areas "for fun" once I'm done with all the serious learning. If I'm not completely burned out, that is.
Am hoping for a better report this time next week. Will keep trying!
Monday, August 15, 2011
Monday, July 18, 2011
Weigh In #3
Tonight's weigh in showed the scale to be at 239.0! Woo! That's a loss of 3.25 from last week, and a loss of 9.5 lbs since I began this leg of the journey about a month ago. It has not been easy, by any means. I'm struggling to find some veggies that I like cooked in a way that I like. Not doing so well on that yet. If I could figure out the veggies, it would make things way easier.
I am really wanting pizza, pizza, pizza. As I'm typing this, Guy Fieri is in a pizza joint on TV and it looks HEAVENLY! Want, want, want! I will allow myself to have some when I feel comfortable. I also know that it will throw my weight off-kilter for a couple of days, so I have to be ready to deal with that, too.
This is a marathon, not a sprint. I can do this!
I am really wanting pizza, pizza, pizza. As I'm typing this, Guy Fieri is in a pizza joint on TV and it looks HEAVENLY! Want, want, want! I will allow myself to have some when I feel comfortable. I also know that it will throw my weight off-kilter for a couple of days, so I have to be ready to deal with that, too.
This is a marathon, not a sprint. I can do this!
Monday, July 11, 2011
2nd Weigh In and New Foods
It's been a few weeks since I've been able to do my "official" Monday weigh in. Tonight's weight was 242.25. That's a loss of 6 lbs since I started. It was a little more last Wednesday, but I think my body is holding on to some fluids. I know I'm doing what I can, so I'll just keep doing what I'm doing.
I should be able to post a little more frequently now. I had to lay off for a while due to a class I was taking. It was a nightmare. I was getting about 3-4 hours of sleep each night, and all I did when I was awake was either work on homework, or worry about working on homework. I finally emailed the professor and dropped the class. It was so intense because it was a 16-week course condensed into a 4-week schedule. Which is way too much for someone that works full-time. I'm now going to take the class in the fall, during the regular 16-week semester.
Last post, I promised to come back and tell you about my experiment with ground turkey. It was interesting. I found a simple recipe online for delicious turkey burgers that called for 1 lb ground turkey, 2 eggs, and salt and pepper. It didn't quite allow itself to be made into burgers, so I just threw the whole mess in the skillet and cooked it. It was a little on the dry side. Probably would not recommend it and will probably not eat them like that again.
Tonight we are trying a balsamic dijon chicken recipe that I found here: GreenLightBites. Roni has tons of recipes on her site and I've found several that I want to try, but never had time, or was brave enough. Well guess what? Now is that time. I'll report back on that recipe, too!
I should be able to post a little more frequently now. I had to lay off for a while due to a class I was taking. It was a nightmare. I was getting about 3-4 hours of sleep each night, and all I did when I was awake was either work on homework, or worry about working on homework. I finally emailed the professor and dropped the class. It was so intense because it was a 16-week course condensed into a 4-week schedule. Which is way too much for someone that works full-time. I'm now going to take the class in the fall, during the regular 16-week semester.
Last post, I promised to come back and tell you about my experiment with ground turkey. It was interesting. I found a simple recipe online for delicious turkey burgers that called for 1 lb ground turkey, 2 eggs, and salt and pepper. It didn't quite allow itself to be made into burgers, so I just threw the whole mess in the skillet and cooked it. It was a little on the dry side. Probably would not recommend it and will probably not eat them like that again.
Tonight we are trying a balsamic dijon chicken recipe that I found here: GreenLightBites. Roni has tons of recipes on her site and I've found several that I want to try, but never had time, or was brave enough. Well guess what? Now is that time. I'll report back on that recipe, too!
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Stepping outside the comfort zone
In order to lose this weight permanently, I have to change my lifestyle. Notice I didn't say, "I have to go on a diet." As Richard Simmons says, "The first three letters of diet are D-I-E, and I don't wanna die!" Neither do I, so I'm making a lifestyle change.
As with any change, it's not easy. I'm having to learn new ways of doing things. There are some foods that will just have no room in my new life. And I'm told that my taste buds will change and there are some foods that I will no longer wish to eat. I know that this is true because I've drank diet soda for several years and the regular stuff is gross now. I just have to get to that point where the greasy, fat-filled burgers/pizzas are unappealing instead of what I'm craving.
In order to make this lifestyle change, I have to learn to eat new foods. This terrifies me for some reason. I don't know how to prepare some foods, especially veggies. I'm also afraid I won't like it and I'll waste money. Or maybe I'll be a little hungry.
Instead of being afraid, I know that I need to embrace the change and view it as an OPPORTUNITY. A chance to experiment, find my inner Bobby Flay, Rachel Ray, or Guy Fieri (not Paula Deen, I think she's a heart attack in a pan). Instead of thinking, "Gosh, what if I don't like it?" I should be thinking, "Gosh, what if this is delicious and I'm missing out???"
To help overcome my "fear" of new foods, I'm going to try something new at least once a week. And I'm going to tell you all about it! Win-win! I will try a new food, and I'll get something to blog about, too!
I'm about to embark on my first experiment tonight! I bought some ground turkey and I'm going to get all Bobby Flay on it and make turkey burgers. Come back tomorrow to hear how that went!
As with any change, it's not easy. I'm having to learn new ways of doing things. There are some foods that will just have no room in my new life. And I'm told that my taste buds will change and there are some foods that I will no longer wish to eat. I know that this is true because I've drank diet soda for several years and the regular stuff is gross now. I just have to get to that point where the greasy, fat-filled burgers/pizzas are unappealing instead of what I'm craving.
In order to make this lifestyle change, I have to learn to eat new foods. This terrifies me for some reason. I don't know how to prepare some foods, especially veggies. I'm also afraid I won't like it and I'll waste money. Or maybe I'll be a little hungry.
Instead of being afraid, I know that I need to embrace the change and view it as an OPPORTUNITY. A chance to experiment, find my inner Bobby Flay, Rachel Ray, or Guy Fieri (not Paula Deen, I think she's a heart attack in a pan). Instead of thinking, "Gosh, what if I don't like it?" I should be thinking, "Gosh, what if this is delicious and I'm missing out???"
To help overcome my "fear" of new foods, I'm going to try something new at least once a week. And I'm going to tell you all about it! Win-win! I will try a new food, and I'll get something to blog about, too!
I'm about to embark on my first experiment tonight! I bought some ground turkey and I'm going to get all Bobby Flay on it and make turkey burgers. Come back tomorrow to hear how that went!
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Losing Les
I disappeared for a few days. A lot has happened in those days. Not all of it was pleasant.
On Thursday, we took Alex to Buffalo Wild Wings to celebrate his 18th birthday. We had so much fun at dinner, laughing and joking. I had the grilled chicken salad and it was ok. I would have preferred a big, juicy burger, but I checked out the nutrition info beforehand, and after consulting with a couple of friends, it was decided the grilled chicken salad was the healthiest choice.
Alex's birthday was actually on the 18th, but Thursday is 55 cent wing night, so he wanted to take advantage of that. We told our server it was his birthday, and they sang and clapped, and had the whole restaurant clap for him. He also got a big hunk of chocolate cake, with a scoop of vanilla ice cream, all drizzled with a ton of chocolate syrup. He was not interested in sharing.
We got home around 8p. I pulled into the driveway, put the car in park, and looked at the clock. I commented to Mike that we should go see his step-dad, Les. And so we did. A little background on this part - Les is 91 years old. He stopped breathing last Monday (June 13). My mother-in-law, Mary Ann, did a sort of CPR and got him back. He was in ICU at Memorial Medical Center, in Springfield, for about a week. He returned to Rushville on Wednesday, June 22, and was admitted to the local nursing home for a week of physical therapy.
We visited with him for about 45 minutes to an hour. He didn't quite have the pep that he normally did, but that was understandable after being on a ventilator in ICU for almost a week, and laying around in a hospital. He looked great though, and was happy to see us. We said our goodbyes and went home.
At 10p, Mike's phone rang. It was his mom. Les was in cardiac arrest. She had just left the nursing home about 20 minutes prior, and the nursing staff was putting him to bed. He stopped breathing again.
I was in my pajamas, so Mike went to the ER. I stayed home, waiting to hear. I finally texted Mike and asked if I should come. He said that I should. I threw on some clothes and headed in the nightmare.
When I got to the ER, one doctor was just coming out of the room to talk to Mary Ann. He was asking her if we wanted to intubate Les again to keep him breathing. There were many things to consider -- all at once. It was sort of a "danged if you do, danged if you don't" situation. If she chose not to, then she would live the rest of her life wondering if she'd essentially signed his death warrant. If she chose to do it, then we might face the decision of having to "pull the plug" later on because he might end up a shell of a human, being kept breathing by science and machines.
The choice was made for her. The other doctor came out and said that they could not get a heartbeat...and lots of other horrible things. It's not like in the movies, where they come out and say, "I'm sorry. We tried everything and there was nothing we could do." In reality, they will tell you all the signs of death, and make you understand without a doubt that your loved one is gone. It was a little more harsh than what I had imagined. In some ways, that's good; but it's very painful to hear. It was also difficult for me to wrap my mind around at the time, for some stupid reason. Denial is a very potent mind drug, I guess.
So the last few days have been a little surreal, as they are when you lose a loved one. Each time I wake up, I know something has gone wrong, but it takes just a couple of seconds for it to come back. I hate that.
Ironically enough, Les passed away on June 23. That is the same day that my mother-in-law lost her mother, 16 years ago. We buried Grammy on June 26 - which happens to be Mary Ann's birthday. So that she didn't have to endure the burial of a loved on a second time in her life, we agreed that it was fine to delay everything a few days. His visitation will be Monday evening, and his funeral will be Tuesday.
Right now, we are all in that numb/surreal stage...a sort of emotional cocoon. He's not there, we know. He's not coming back, we know. But we haven't had the services that will give us that sense of closure. That will come soon enough.
On Thursday, we took Alex to Buffalo Wild Wings to celebrate his 18th birthday. We had so much fun at dinner, laughing and joking. I had the grilled chicken salad and it was ok. I would have preferred a big, juicy burger, but I checked out the nutrition info beforehand, and after consulting with a couple of friends, it was decided the grilled chicken salad was the healthiest choice.
Alex's birthday was actually on the 18th, but Thursday is 55 cent wing night, so he wanted to take advantage of that. We told our server it was his birthday, and they sang and clapped, and had the whole restaurant clap for him. He also got a big hunk of chocolate cake, with a scoop of vanilla ice cream, all drizzled with a ton of chocolate syrup. He was not interested in sharing.
We got home around 8p. I pulled into the driveway, put the car in park, and looked at the clock. I commented to Mike that we should go see his step-dad, Les. And so we did. A little background on this part - Les is 91 years old. He stopped breathing last Monday (June 13). My mother-in-law, Mary Ann, did a sort of CPR and got him back. He was in ICU at Memorial Medical Center, in Springfield, for about a week. He returned to Rushville on Wednesday, June 22, and was admitted to the local nursing home for a week of physical therapy.
We visited with him for about 45 minutes to an hour. He didn't quite have the pep that he normally did, but that was understandable after being on a ventilator in ICU for almost a week, and laying around in a hospital. He looked great though, and was happy to see us. We said our goodbyes and went home.
At 10p, Mike's phone rang. It was his mom. Les was in cardiac arrest. She had just left the nursing home about 20 minutes prior, and the nursing staff was putting him to bed. He stopped breathing again.
I was in my pajamas, so Mike went to the ER. I stayed home, waiting to hear. I finally texted Mike and asked if I should come. He said that I should. I threw on some clothes and headed in the nightmare.
When I got to the ER, one doctor was just coming out of the room to talk to Mary Ann. He was asking her if we wanted to intubate Les again to keep him breathing. There were many things to consider -- all at once. It was sort of a "danged if you do, danged if you don't" situation. If she chose not to, then she would live the rest of her life wondering if she'd essentially signed his death warrant. If she chose to do it, then we might face the decision of having to "pull the plug" later on because he might end up a shell of a human, being kept breathing by science and machines.
The choice was made for her. The other doctor came out and said that they could not get a heartbeat...and lots of other horrible things. It's not like in the movies, where they come out and say, "I'm sorry. We tried everything and there was nothing we could do." In reality, they will tell you all the signs of death, and make you understand without a doubt that your loved one is gone. It was a little more harsh than what I had imagined. In some ways, that's good; but it's very painful to hear. It was also difficult for me to wrap my mind around at the time, for some stupid reason. Denial is a very potent mind drug, I guess.
So the last few days have been a little surreal, as they are when you lose a loved one. Each time I wake up, I know something has gone wrong, but it takes just a couple of seconds for it to come back. I hate that.
Ironically enough, Les passed away on June 23. That is the same day that my mother-in-law lost her mother, 16 years ago. We buried Grammy on June 26 - which happens to be Mary Ann's birthday. So that she didn't have to endure the burial of a loved on a second time in her life, we agreed that it was fine to delay everything a few days. His visitation will be Monday evening, and his funeral will be Tuesday.
Right now, we are all in that numb/surreal stage...a sort of emotional cocoon. He's not there, we know. He's not coming back, we know. But we haven't had the services that will give us that sense of closure. That will come soon enough.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Heroes and Veggies
Tonight's CrossFit workout was what we call a "Hero Workout." They are created and named in honor of a service man/woman that gave their life for our country. They are hard. They suck. But it is an honor and privilege to do them. As I told the class tonight, they made the ultimate sacrifice, so the least we can do is make a small sacrifice in the gym by doing this workout.
I have a problem with negative self-talk when I do these hard workouts. It gives me time to think and I get upset with myself because of what I can't do. But that also drives me to go harder. I know I am capable of more, but there's too much bulk to move around very fast. And I know I am WAY harder on myself than anyone could ever dream of being. I expect perfection and get angry when I don't give it.
The details of the workout.... 3 rounds, for time: 50 sumo deadlift high-pulls; 25 burpees (not able to do, subbed 25 squats and 25 push ups); 25 box jumps; run 400 meters. I finished in 29:16. I'm still mad at myself.
I've been trying to expand my food horizons with steamed veggies. I hate vegetables, except the ones that really aren't good for me - like corn! Love corn, but corn is actually a grain, and grains are of the devil. Monday night I had a bag of steamed veggies that included roasted potatoes (also evil), peppers (ick), and snap peas. Oh my stars, I hate snap peas! They were awful, but I ate them all anyway. I reminded myself what Andy and Kristy have told me - food is fuel.
Tonight, I had a different bag of veggies. I didn't pay a lot of attention to what was in there. I knew cauliflower (ick), carrots (ick), and something else. I was exhausted (still am) when I got home from the gym, so I just threw the bag in the microwave. As it cooked, I could smell this horrid odor that was vaguely familiar. I was too tired to really process it though. I finally got up and got the bag out and opened it up. Oh! The smell was atrocious! I checked the list of veggies -- those stupid snap peas AGAIN!
I've been sitting here with the bowl beside me for over an hour now. I'm hungry, but I have to eat my veggies before I can have the chicken that Mike grilled for me. *sigh*
I have a problem with negative self-talk when I do these hard workouts. It gives me time to think and I get upset with myself because of what I can't do. But that also drives me to go harder. I know I am capable of more, but there's too much bulk to move around very fast. And I know I am WAY harder on myself than anyone could ever dream of being. I expect perfection and get angry when I don't give it.
The details of the workout.... 3 rounds, for time: 50 sumo deadlift high-pulls; 25 burpees (not able to do, subbed 25 squats and 25 push ups); 25 box jumps; run 400 meters. I finished in 29:16. I'm still mad at myself.
I've been trying to expand my food horizons with steamed veggies. I hate vegetables, except the ones that really aren't good for me - like corn! Love corn, but corn is actually a grain, and grains are of the devil. Monday night I had a bag of steamed veggies that included roasted potatoes (also evil), peppers (ick), and snap peas. Oh my stars, I hate snap peas! They were awful, but I ate them all anyway. I reminded myself what Andy and Kristy have told me - food is fuel.
Tonight, I had a different bag of veggies. I didn't pay a lot of attention to what was in there. I knew cauliflower (ick), carrots (ick), and something else. I was exhausted (still am) when I got home from the gym, so I just threw the bag in the microwave. As it cooked, I could smell this horrid odor that was vaguely familiar. I was too tired to really process it though. I finally got up and got the bag out and opened it up. Oh! The smell was atrocious! I checked the list of veggies -- those stupid snap peas AGAIN!
I've been sitting here with the bowl beside me for over an hour now. I'm hungry, but I have to eat my veggies before I can have the chicken that Mike grilled for me. *sigh*
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
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